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Norm MacDonald
Willard Fillmore

Dave Chappelle
Rusty P. Hayes

Elaine Stritch
Miss Crock

Danny DeVito
Grover Cleaver

Daniel Benzali
Detective Tom Dewey

Sherman Hemsley
Chip Oswald

Sarah Silverman
Hillary

Malcolm Stewart
Roger

Lochlyn Munro
Officer Richardsen

Brent Chapman
Dane

Brian Jensen
Dane

Shawn Macdonald
Dane

Kelly Fiddick
Dane

Helena Yea
Aunt Mabel

Lorenzo Campbell
Tito

Damon Thornton
Tito's Henchman

Lorena Gale
Angry Momma

Sue Astley
Morgue Operator